I met DH on a blind date in Dec, 2000. At the time, I was 25 and he was 27. Call us crazy but we stopped using condoms in Feb, 2001. In June, since I was still not pg, we then decided to seek help. We met with a first OB/GYN who put me on Clomid 50mg, CD5-9 for 3 months, just out of the blue, without running any testings on either of us.

I took 2 rounds of those pills and it was the worst experience of my life. Hot flashes, bad mood swings, nauseous... poor boyfriend didn't know what to do with me. We decided not to take the 3rd round since it was making me so sick. We tried on our own for a few months until we decided to get married.

We then decided to start on condoms again so we could focus on the wedding preparations and I would not get pg and not fit in my gown. About 2 months before the wedding, we stopped the condoms again and found a new OB/GYN. We thought it would be the best time for us to go through all of the testings. I got the full work and DH got and SA done. Everything came out fine but since I'm overweight and having a hard time with my bloodsugar, OB/GYN put me on metformin for 3 months and told me to start taking Folic Acid.

We got married on August 16th, 2002. I was taking Metformin and Folic Acid at the time but the Met was making me so nauseous that I had lost a lot of working days (that's how bad it was). I had very severe diarreah (sorry graphic) and told OB/GYN after 2 months that I could not take them anymore. She agreed with me stopping the Met and she prescribed 4 months of Clomid 50mg, CD5-9 (same as the other OB/GYN but this GYN was following the steps and was much more interested in helping us! Maybe because we were now married?!) She told me to take them at night so I would not feel any of those bad side effects. She was right!! It was pure heaven!

I took a first round of Clomid, nothing... let me explain that it's been almost 2 years since we first started to try to get pregnant. People around me was only telling me one thing " STRESS TOO HIGH ". I knew it but how was I supposed to lower my stress when all I could think about was that I was not believing in that baby anymore and that my job was about to make me go nuts because they were cutting down on their employees more and more.. and dh only had a seasonal job... we're still living at my parents.... and my parents-in-law's marriage was in jeopardy for some reasons. It was too much for me, I couldn't just focus on a possible pregnancy so all that people was telling me was that I was too stressed and that I needed to find a way to relax and think about myself a bit more. I would get pregnant right away. I didn't believe them but...

That's what I did..... on my 2nd round of Clomid, I decided to spend time alone in my bedroom, door locked... so I could have some relaxation sessions and be in a quiet environment for a little while. I did those relaxation sessions (that soothing voice on a tape who tells you to relax all of those muscles from head to toes...) I believe, 5 days in a row. Believe it or not, it was around ovulation day and I didn't realize it. I also went to bed at night for the whole cycle (and still do), listening to a very nice cd with sounds of ocean waves and a light background music. It stops me from thinking about those nasty things at work, my in-laws, my issues with TTC and so on. I believe the combination of the sessions, the ocean waves CD and the Clomid is what saved me from the darkness of the stress I was going through and it got me PG. (or so to speak, I think DH has something to do with it too) *LOL*

My temps went sky high, they usually go between 97.5 and 97.9 post-O but this time it varies between 98.0 and 98.4 (very odd for me). My coverline is very high because I didn't temp in the first 2 weeks. I believe my coverline should be around 97.4, 97.5 as usual but it's at 97.9 and higher than ever.

I have been as much as 12 days late before without any reasons...... but this time, after 2 days of waiting AF, I don't know why but a feeling was telling me that there was something going on. I didn't feel any bloating, abdomen swelling or didn't get any pimples like I usually experience right before AF. It kinda put a doubt in my mind that there was really something going on.

Yesterday morning Feb 22, 2003, I didn't have any HPT's at home so I lost my " first morning urine ". I went to the pharmacy and got a very sensitive HPT which detects 10 units of HCG (I believe it's the most sensitive test on the market). DH and I saw 2 lines within 3 minutes. It was half the color of the control line, it was very visible and very much there. We could even see the 2nd line from 3-4 feet away. After about 10 minutes, it got even darker, which really knocked me down. My hands started shaking and my legs got weak. DH just looked at me and gave me this " hmmm I like this result " look. *LOL*

Here I am, one day later, and I still don't believe it. I am still having some AF-like cramps about 4-5 times a day and I don't like it... Maybe it's a false result? Maybe I don't want to be disappointed in case it's a chemical pregnancy? Maybe it's just too good to be true? I think it will only really sink in when my OB/GYN tells me " you are pregnant ". I will call her tomorrow and schedule a beta. In the meanwhile, I have ordered some hpt's from the TTC store just in case I get those before I can go for the beta. I think a second positive result will really make me realize that this is it? I'd go at the pharmacy again but I want a different brand and those from the TTC Store are very sensitive... or so says the people here :-)

Sorry so long but I really wanted you guys to know all the story. Danny and I have been married for 6 months now and we are lucky we can already say we're gonna be mommy and daddy soon. My parents are very much excited about this. We haven't told my in-laws yet, we're waiting for the beta results and looking for a special way to tell them.

Thanks for reading, I know it was long but it makes so much sense writing it all down. Thanks for letting me do this.

See you all soon on the alumnae board.

Positive thoughts to all
Love,
**Shelyn
xxxx